I was looking forward to seeing Roscoe's face the first time he heard acappella singing at church. He listened to music from his music box and Alisha's iPod, but there is nothing like the sound of real voices making sound. I don't know whether he would have been shocked into crying or whether he will just gaze in amazement, but I was anticipating the day when I can see his reaction to that first sound. His face was so expressive and I'm sure it would have been wonderful to see when he first heard real music.
I was also looking forward to Roscoe being able to smell food. His nose worked just fine, but since no food is allowed in the ICU at Kaiser or UCSF he never really smelled the variety of food that we eat each day. I tried holding a peach up to his nose, but such a faint smell was most likely drowned out by the hospital smells and air being pushed into his trach. I wanted to see how he would have reacted to smelling food being prepared and cooked in the kitchen at home, how his nose would have led him through the transitioning smells that occur during a simple dinner preparation.
Alisha and I used to go on walks fairly often on the walkways around our house, prior to September 2013. Another thing I was anticipating taking Roscoe on walks along those same pathways. There are birds, rabbits, trees, fields, and a pond that Roscoe would have experienced along that path. The pathways are something of a metaphor for our lives. The route we commonly walk is the route along which I proposed to Alisha with an oversized ring box and ring that I'd made out of a hula hoop:
To bring Roscoe along that path would be a symbol of the next major step in our lives being taken. I wish we could have taken that step with him in our arms.